School days, school days…

I have class tonight.  And I’m sort of terrified.  As usual.

I’m currently getting my Master of Liberal Studies (with an emphasis on creative writing) and although I love it, I haven’t given it as much attention as I need to.  I haven’t taken as many classes as I should.  I haven’t applied myself the way I really need to and do the extra work I should in order to REALLY get everything out of this opportunity that I need to.

Yet, I’m still sittin’ on a 3.85, suckas…

So this semester I WILL do better.  I’m moving school up higher on my list of priorities and will rock it out in class and beat down those assignments until they tremble at the mere mention of my name. 

(Heh.  That just brought to mind sheets of paper suddenly whimpering and quivering in fear, with the paperclip suddenly unwinding itself and knocking over pencils and pens as it runs away…  Think about it for a sec, it’s fun.)

However, the first day of class is always nerve-wracking.  And it’s not a matter of being nervous about going into class or meeting people.  I can talk to a tree stump, that’s never a problem.  And I’m a theatre kid, so exuding fake confidence in uncertain situations is like breathing.  It’s all the unknowns and the possibilities – good or bad. 

I know the professor so he shouldn’t be an issue, but what if he decides he doesn’t like me?  I missed a buttload of class last semester due to my broken face, will he remember that and resent me??  What about the other students?  Will I like them?  Am I going to be the youngest one in there AGAIN?  I’m going to be sharing my writing with them, writing that’s way different from blogging.  What if they don’t like it?  What if they like it at first but by the end think I suck??  What if they don’t like ME?  What if they’re MEAN to me?!?  What is they hate me and steal my juice box at snack time or tear up my Lisa Frank folder?!?!?

Hello, neurosis, my old friend…

These things most likely won’t happen.  I’m going to like the class just fine, the people are going to be perfectly nice with a few sprinklings of awesome and suck, the teacher will be just as good as he was last year and I will be just fine.  I always get nervous about class and it always ends up being fine.  But see….that’s the other problem.  I don’t want to be just fine.  I want to be AMAZING. 

I want my work and my stories to shine and glitter like literary diamonds in a sea of paste.  I want people to stop in their tracks after hearing my work; to look at each other and shake their heads, awed and amazed.  I want my professor to slowly take off his reading glasses at his desk after reading my paper; to lean back in his chair, tears glistening, as he thinks, “Yes.  Finally.  It’s now all been worth it.”  I want adulation, accolades and possibly a pony for my superior work.  I wanna be the BESTEST EVAR!!

Clearly, judging from the previous paragraph, I have a ways to go.

So, in anticipation of the reception of my scholastic achievements, I sit with my doubts and fears and stew.  And wish I had my teddy bear handy, because I could really use his ear to whisper secrets into right now…

Instead, I turn to you, my moppets.  How do you handle first ______ jitters?  Other than just telling yourself to calm the f*ck down and stop being such a nervous little tit….

Photo Source

August 23, 2011 22 Comments Short URL, , , , , I fail at life., Musings, Writerly Things

Notice anything?

Thanks to the lovely and wonderful team of Lizzie and Isaiah of Love Your Way and ctrl-p, my blog now KICKASSTASTIC!  A post about the process will soon follow, but let’s just say that there were Gorgonzola burgers, puppy kisses, amazing (and quick) design involved, along with much awe on my part.  There will be more changes as we go, so please email me and let me know if there is anything wonkadoodle going on.  (and if there is, it’s more than likely because I jacked with something Lizzie and Isaiah did.)

I’d like to thank all you lovely little moppets for your patience.  While I didn’t intend the hiatus to be this long, it’s been worth it.

ALSO!  If you haven’t sent out your pen pal letter, SEND ‘EM!  If you haven’t received anything, let me know.  And if you HAVE, then send me an email about it!  Give a synopsis of what you and your pal would be doing, and send photos if the letter or envelope was especially fun or pretty.  I got mine and it is AWESOME and I can’t wait to share.

SO!  What’s new?  Tell me things…

 

August 22, 2011 38 Comments Short URLUncategorized

Hiatus

We had a family emergency recently, so I’m taking a break from the blog so we can regroup.  Which will involve lots of cuddling, puppy snuggles and arguing over the remote.  I’ll be back in a week of two, so y’all take care and go hug some necks of people you love.

And get off the damn internet for a day or two.  It’s more refreshing than you think.

Love, hugs and kisses, my moppets,

Alyssa

August 1, 2011 Short URLThe Fam.

Bit of a break today…

…while I get caught up.  Instead, I shall send you elsewhere.

We have our couples for APW’s Marriage for Equality event!  It’s been retooled for even more amazing goodness, and the couples are just adorable.  I SOOOO wish I could go! I’m trying to get Jethro to buy me a ticket for my birthday, but he’s having none of it.  Something about paying bills for electricity and my broken face, or some such nonsense.

Am I the last person to find Matt Bites?  With its gorgeous food styling and ridiculous recipes?  I now want aguas frescas, meyer lemon cupcakes, blood orange caramels and cilantro chicken. NOW.

I cannot stop reading Offbeat Mama, if only for its Monday Mama Montage.  It’s an off-shoot of Offbeat Bride, which I devoured during my wedding planning.  If I didn’t already have a crush on Ariel for those two sites, Offbeat Home would have cinched it.

There goes your productivity today.  You’re welcome.

 

July 27, 2011 1 Comment Short URLLink Love

Eatin’ Pants: Dulce De Leche Brownies

Sometimes, you need chocolate.

And I’m not talking about wussy Hershey’s chocolate, or some crappy box brownies.

I’m talking deep dark chocolate, fudgy and decadent, with ribbons of creamy gooey dulce de leche swirled throughout.

These are not everyday brownies.  These are special occasion brownies, the kind that you make for birthdays and baby showers and breakup’s.  Even when you make them for yourself, you need to put on a little lipstick and something silky in preparation. (And if you, as Jethro puts it, “got the lactose-itis” like me, you include about 6 pills of Lactaid.  SO worth it.)

You do not mess around with these brownies.

Respect the brownie. Read More

July 26, 2011 19 Comments Short URLEatin' Pants, Recipes

GoodReads

Good LORD, there are a lot of your readers out there.  I’m going to compile the suggestions into one post (eventually), but since so many people kept talking about being a part of GoodReads, I figured it was time to update my profile and let y’all friend me.  (I joined in 2007!)

You can find me under alyssa [dot] kindofamess [at] gmail [dot] com.

In the comments, list your email address too, so we can add each other and then judge everyone based on their reading selections. (I KID!  Besides, I know I’ll lose cool points once y’all see the entire oeuvre of Susan Elizabeth Phillips on there….I get fixated on an author, it’s a thing….)

July 25, 2011 16 Comments Short URL, , , , , Books, Buy Me That!, Have, Read this!, Want, WANT., Writerly Things

Butterfly in the sky, I can go twice as high…

Take a look, it’s in a book, a reading rainbow…
Let’s talk books!

I am a reader. I always have been. If I don’t have something to read, I get twitchy. Growing up, my parents always refused my demands for candy or toys, but I always knew I could get something to read if I asked nicely. (This resutled in me getting a lot of Archie and Kathy Kane comics, Disney Adventures magazine and National Enquirer or World Weekly News. ) I also made a weekly trip to the library where I’d pick out 13 books because that was the biggest amount I could. You couldn’t get more than 13. I know, I asked.

I read while watching TV, in the car, eating, getting ready for school…and I still do, actually. (By the way, reading and watching TV IS possible and does not mean that you can come change the channel to Extreme Ice Road Logging Fishing Alligator Truckers…JETHRO.)

These are some of my favorites, but this changes. A LOT.

Read More

July 25, 2011 80 Comments Short URL, , , , , Books, Buy Me That!, Geekery, Have, Read this!, Writerly Things

LOOKIT!: APW and I’m Better in Real Life

In case you missed it, on Friday I was over at APW with Ask Team Practical: Friendors, Greeting, Photoshoots, & Feeding People.

BUT, I was also honored to be one of the people Lauren picked to guest-post about honeymoons while she was on HER honeymoon.

And she better be back, because I want to hear about the wedding so badly right now I CAN’T STAND IT!

July 24, 2011 2 Comments Short URLAPW, LOOKIT!

Video

Sad Bastard Songs: Folkies

I say folk, but I’m sure someone will correct me, but it’s close. I guess in a perfect world we’d have a better term for folk/rock/pop/blues-ish music…
However, in a perfect world, my mom would have realized that I was a massively mature 16 year old who deserved to go to Lilth Fair and Austin is NOT too far for me to go for a concert…. But it’s not perfect, is it, mom? IS IT?!?
But I’m fine. It’s fine…I’m over it. It’s fine….*sniff*

Train Song – Mindy Smith
I get the feeling that when he gets off that damn train, she’s gonna stab his a**.
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July 22, 2011 7 Comments Short URL, , I gots the music in me, You Sad Bastard

I solemnly swear I am up to no good…

I had another post planned for today, but Jethro and I took an impromptu trip to the movies and saw the final Harry Potter movie.  And I am left oddly…bereft?

Here’s the thing, I’m not a huge Harry Potter fan.  I mean, I REALLY like the books and have re-read and enjoyed them all, on the first day they came out ever since the fifth book.  However, I’m iffy on the finer points.  I can’t name the unforgivable curses, I get Fred and George mixed up and I continually mix up the books.  (Did Hermione get better teeth in three or four?)  But as the last movie came forth, I was excited but not terribly so.  It would be good to have a finish, but no biggie, right?

Wrong.

It started during Snape’s death.  (If ANYONE just hollered out, “Spoiler alert!!” I will smack you.)  It’s all Alan Rickman’s fault.  If he wasn’t so damn good with those eyes and that terrible hair and just that look on his face…  So then the tears started.  And while they didn’t fall a lot, there was tons of tearing up and snotting up and sniffling and generally feeling like an idiot for getting all soggy over a movie about a boy who does magic.

I first started reading the books after the third one had come out.  The first was published right after I graduated high school and I’d steadfastly refused to read them because everyone else was.  (Yeah.  I was that kid.)  However, a friend had given the Prisoner of Azkaban backstage during tech week of a show.  I was doing costumes and had lots of down time and chose to use part of it to mock him for reading a kid’s book.  The next day, he handed me Philosopher’s Stone and told me to shut up and read it.  Day after that, I gave it back and said, “Got any more?”

Just like that, I was a Pot-head.  *sigh*

Recently, a group of Jethro’s friends have passed around a link to a story on students at A&M having a quidditch team.  As I laughed at their poking fun at these kids (I mean, SERIOUSLY guys?) I realized something.  These kids were maybe four, five, six years old when the books came out.  They grew up with Harry Potter.  THIS IS THEIR STAR WARS.

Once I realized that, I needed to have a lie-down.  Christ, I’m old.

Now I’m old and sad.***  No more midnight movie premieres with my friend J. as we eat Bertie Bott”s Every Flavor Beans and freaking out when we got the Booger ones.  (I ALWAYS got the booger ones. *sigh*)  No more waiting for the day of release books and staying up to 4am to read it.  No more waiting to see how the movies will screw up the books and make Hermione less bad-ass than she was. (DON’T get me started on the Yule Ball.)

So let’s talk.  What’s your Harry Potter experience?  (And if you were in single digits as you read it, DON’T BRING THAT UP.)

***Okay, as I was typing this up, I continued my re-watch of Angel and of COURSE it had to be the episode where FRED DIES.  GOD, I might have to take a personal day tomorrow.

Image source

July 21, 2011 38 Comments Short URLGeekery

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