Eatin’ Pants: Dulce De Leche Brownies

Sometimes, you need chocolate.

And I’m not talking about wussy Hershey’s chocolate, or some crappy box brownies.

I’m talking deep dark chocolate, fudgy and decadent, with ribbons of creamy gooey dulce de leche swirled throughout.

These are not everyday brownies.  These are special occasion brownies, the kind that you make for birthdays and baby showers and breakup’s.  Even when you make them for yourself, you need to put on a little lipstick and something silky in preparation. (And if you, as Jethro puts it, “got the lactose-itis” like me, you include about 6 pills of Lactaid.  SO worth it.)

You do not mess around with these brownies.

Respect the brownie.

For this, you can use a jar or can of dulce de leche, but I like to make my own.  However, most people making their own requires boiling a can of sweetened condensed milk on a low simmer until it turns into that lovely caramel-y goodness.

This scares the beejeezus out of me.

No, don’t tell me its easy and safe and you’ve been doing it for years.  I believe you and I’m jealous.  But seriously, I have had enough little “incidents” in my life for me to know that YOU boiling a can of sweetened condensed milk for four hours results in lovely dulce de leche.  ME, boiling a can of sweetened condensed milk for four hours, resulting in pressurized dairy products exploding, searing hot caramel all over my kitchen and a melted face that will not look good on a Christmas card.

I know how these things work.  Jesus loves me, but he also loves to poke me with a stick if I try to get fancy.

SO.  For this recipe, I recommend the David Lebovitz’s way of making dulce de leche.  He’s famous ‘n sh*t, so you know this is gonna be good.  It’s basically just giving the sweetened condensed milk a water bath, which is more time intensive, but it’s also safer.  Give yourself time to make this, possibly even the day before.  He says it takes at most a little over an hour, but I’ve found it takes longer.

The full recipe comes from sweetnicks. I still have the printed out copy I first tried it on, and it’s dated 2006.  So this is a five-year old recipe that I still count as my go-to when fancy chocolate is required.  That’s probably a bigger compliment than anything I can say, so I’ll shut up and get to the good stuff.

Dulce de Leche Brownies

Adapted from sweetnicks

14 oz of dulce de leche

Brownie Layer
1 cup unsalted butter
2 cups sugar
3 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 cup plus 2 tablespoons all purpose flour
3/4 cup cocoa powder (I prefer to use dark.)
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt

Preheat oven to 350 F.

Using buttered parchment paper, line a 9×13 pan, leaving at least a 2 in overlap on each side. (This is important, don’t skip this part.) Foil can be used, but I don’t recommend it. (When putting the parchment in the pan, go ahead and crease into the corners of the pan so it sits in the pan well. You don’t want it sliding around or popping out. It makes a mess when you pour the batter in. Don’t ask how I know this.)

In a medium bowl, mix together the cocoa, flour, baking soda and salt. Set aside.

Cream together the butter and sugar. Mix in one egg at a time and then add in the vanilla. Stir well.

Slowly mix in the dry ingredients with the wet. Batter will not be perfectly smooth, but will be a pretty dark dark brown. Admire the prettiness of the batter. Resist the urge to test it out with your finger. Forgive yourself when you do.

Spread the batter in the pan. It will be thick and resist spreading. Accept what you cannot change.

Drop the dulce de leche in dollops over the batter. Make a plopping noise with your mouth, it makes it more fun. Using a knife, swirl the dulce de leche and the batter together. It will resist this also. Respect the batter, bt don’t give in. Also, don’t mix together, just swirl. Like a good marriage, they should form a partnership, but remain individuals.

Set the pan on a baking sheet and bake for 26 to 30 minutes. If testing, remember to test only the brownie part, not the dulce de leche. It will be gooey and possibly burn you when you are unable to resist licking the test batter. Try not to over-bake, the brownies should be cooked until they are just set.

Take out of the oven and set on a baking rack or trivet to cool. Using the hanging-offy bits of parchment paper, use that to lift out of the pan. (SEE? It’s important.) Chill in the refrigerator for 30 to 45 minutes before cutting into bars. If you can’t wait that long, it is perfectly acceptable to only wait until it is cool enough for you and a friend to eat out of the pan with a spoon. Share the spoon. And make sure you’re wearing lipstick and something silky.

There are no pictures of this, because I don’t want your faces to explode. Instead, I give you something almost as hot and sexy as dulce de leche brownies.

Man makes a body’s teeth sweat, doesn’t he?

19 Comments on “Eatin’ Pants: Dulce De Leche Brownies”

  1. Cate O'Malley
    July 26, 2011 at 8:39 am #

    Love your description of the brownies, and that picture at the end doesn’t hurt either. Glad you liked them as much as we do! And, of course, now I feel the incredible urge to make them. Now. Perfect way to celebrate birthday week, methinks.

  2. Kristin
    July 26, 2011 at 9:10 am #

    The day you shared this recipe with me was the day I fell in love with brownies all over again. And also learned to make Dulce de Leche. AMAZING.

    • kindofamess
      July 27, 2011 at 8:55 am #

      After I gave it to you, I realized I needed to share it with everyone else. We must spread the gospel of the dulce de leche brownies!

  3. Allie
    July 26, 2011 at 9:18 am #

    MMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmm … that’s all. Going to zombie over to the bakery now …

  4. mere...
    July 26, 2011 at 9:29 am #

    “Jesus loves me, but he also loves to poke me with a stick if I try to get fancy.” This is my life 98% of the time. Thank you for putting it into words. And of course, for the brownie recipe!

    • Erin
      July 26, 2011 at 10:15 am #

      Um, yes. I snorted over this one. and DdLBs? YUM.

  5. lizzie
    July 26, 2011 at 10:54 am #

    DON’T YOU TEMPT ME, ALYSSA.

  6. Kristy
    July 26, 2011 at 11:01 am #

    Alyssa, you slay me. And now you’ve made me add yet another recipe to my Desserts folder (which contains more than all the healthy food folders combined by now, I’m sure). Mmmm, dulce de leche brownies.

    • kindofamess
      July 27, 2011 at 8:55 am #

      I totally need to make these for our next meet-up. Remind me!!

  7. JazzWhispers
    July 26, 2011 at 11:33 am #

    Those sound delicious. Nom.

  8. Army Amy
    July 26, 2011 at 11:38 am #

    I’m so torn: I want to eat these, but if I make them, I’ll be forced to eat all of them probably resulting in a food coma. What do I do?!*

    • kindofamess
      July 27, 2011 at 8:56 am #

      Make the brownies! Then you get chocolate AND sleep! I don’t see a downside here, m’am….

  9. ElfPuddle
    July 26, 2011 at 2:00 pm #

    Right. I haven’t walked in almost a week, I’m PMSing and bloated, and one of my bestest internet friends gives me a brownie recipe on her blog. You are MEAN and CRUEL, Alyssa!

    • kindofamess
      July 27, 2011 at 8:56 am #

      Heh heh….eat the brownies! EAT THEM!

  10. Meghan
    July 26, 2011 at 3:08 pm #

    GET IN MY BELLY. Now. I said now.

    • kindofamess
      July 27, 2011 at 8:57 am #

      The baby wants the brownies. She told me.

  11. pinchofthis
    July 26, 2011 at 5:45 pm #

    ok. who’s making these in bulk and sending them to everyone here?
    gah! I want them.

  12. Amy
    August 2, 2011 at 1:03 pm #

    So, I made these brownies last night, and they immediately solved most of my problems. Or at least I managed to forget about my horrific day at work and the coworker who made me cry while I was eating them. And so I thank you from the bottom of my chocolate-loving heart.

  13. VNikol
    March 6, 2012 at 3:13 pm #

    I am most thankful for the hilariously lovely description, for this incredibly decadent sounding recipe and for Taye Diggs. Amen.

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